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BILKO
24-11-05, 12:17 PM
A Cajun was stopped by a game warden in South Louisiana
recently with two ice chests of fish, leaving a bayou well
known for its fishing.

The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch
those fish?"

"Naw, ma fren, I ain't got none of dem, no. Dese here are my
pet fish."

"Pet fish?"

"Ya. Avery night I take dese here fish down to de bayou and
let dem swim 'round for a while. Den I whistle and dey jump
rat back inta dis here ice chest and I take dem home."

"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!"

The Cajun looked at the game warden for a moment and then
said, "It's de truth ma' fren. I'll show you. It really works."

"Okay, I've GOT to see this!"

The Cajun poured the fish into the bayou and stood and waited.

After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said,
"Well?"

"Well, what?" Said the Cajun.

"When are you going to call them back?"

"Call who back?"

"The FISH!"

"What fish?" :D

BILKO
24-11-05, 12:29 PM
Breast Stroke Competition

There was a competition to cross the English channel doing only the breaststroke, and the three women who entered the race were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde!

After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breast stroker. About 40 minutes later, the redhead crawled up on the shore and was declared the second place finisher.

Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and promptly collapsed in front of the worried onlookers. When the reporters asked why it took her so long to complete the race, she replied, "I don't want to sound like I'm a sore loser, but I think those two other girls were using their arms."

BILKO
24-11-05, 12:54 PM
A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
CHEESEBURGER: $2.50

CHICKEN SANDWICH: $3.50

HANDJOBS: $10.00

Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to a meager looking group of men.

"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?"

"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

"Yes", she purrs, "I am."

The man replies: "Well then, please go wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger
______

Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no.

"Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.

His partner says, "Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it."