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Robin427
04-03-06, 09:02 PM
The Archbishop of Canterbury kneels in prayer and says to the Lord:

"Oh, Lord, you are almighty - can you not settle the divisions between the world's religions and bring peace upon these troubled times?"

With the voices of a million angels, the Lord replied:

"These divisions go back centuries, I can't even heal the conflict between the Catholics and Protestants, and don't get me started on the Sunni and Shia Muslims... is there something easier I can help you with?"

The Archbishop thinks for a moment and says:

"Yes, the UK Cobra Club are unable to heal the rifts in their numbers as to which Cobra is best... perhaps you could sort that one out"

The Lord hesitates...

"So, world peace you say?"

Purple AK
04-03-06, 09:14 PM
Yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry Robin. Any incoming flak is Self Motivated. Your on your own with this one!! LEAVE IT EH!!

route66
04-03-06, 09:56 PM
If I didn't know any better, I would say this resembled a clear case of trolling.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll

Steve

RichardG
04-03-06, 10:00 PM
He's the messiah. I should know, I've followed a few...

Purple AK
04-03-06, 10:01 PM
If I didn't know any better, I would say this resembled a clear case of trolling.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll

Steve
Steve. If only Life was so Simply :rolleyes:

rich
04-03-06, 11:38 PM
Robin,
We all know God along with Allah. Supported by Jews and Ansimics, Budests and Mormons, Catholics and Protestants, Sunni and Shia, Taoics and Unitarinists would obviously choose a GD for its out standing holy-better-isn't-it-ness

However some of us are devil fearing folk :cool:

Why are you so like those idiots who come knocking at my door every month or so trying to tell me that their religion is better than mine!

Robin427
05-03-06, 06:09 AM
Just trying to instill some humour into this wintry world. Never hinted at my opinion of which is better, I think it was you that mentioned the G word... (the one without the "o") :)

...speaks volumes, I think :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

TINKA
05-03-06, 10:45 AM
Robin will you never learn:( we can all see the meaning behind your joke or you would not have changed it:rolleyes: Just watch out for Wilf as once again you are showing why he had a go at you before :eek:

RichardG
05-03-06, 11:51 AM
For the love of satan, just let it go. That's to everyone.

robert
05-03-06, 07:25 PM
Guys

With respect, Robin mentioned NO manufacturer, and it was a joke for crying out loud.

What is this place coming to?????????????

Grease Monkey
05-03-06, 07:29 PM
I'll throw my hat in the ring here.. Why is everyone so down on Robin at the moment?:confused: :confused:

He made A comment a few weeks back that MAY have been misinterpreted as being of dubious merit, but since then everyone's been rather biggoted about the whole thing. Come on people, get over it and stop being arses.


(And yes it is an old gag. The varient i heard was Prince Charles asking if god could make world peace or the public like Camilla... :D )

Clarkson
05-03-06, 07:29 PM
Here we go!!!:D :D :D :D :D

The key is in,all you have to do now is turn it!:D :D

Clarkson
05-03-06, 07:32 PM
Don't let SOGOOD read this or you will start him off too!!:D :D :D

Grease Monkey
05-03-06, 07:32 PM
Here we go!!!:D :D :D :D :D

The key is in,all you have to do now is turn it!:D :D


The only key i want to turn has 400 HP on the other end. And in fact (fuel & weather permitting) i will be doing just that tomorrow to get to work :D :D

Clarkson
05-03-06, 07:34 PM
The only key i want to turn has 400 HP on the other end. And in fact (fuel & weather permitting) i will be doing just that tomorrow to get to work :D :D

HaHa, me too, when I get my MSD 6AL!:confused: :D

plod
05-03-06, 07:37 PM
Well I quite liked it!!!

Robin keep em coming I say mate. Some people here just read between the lines that are between the lines a little too often and literally.. :mad:

I always thought black was better than white

Robin427
05-03-06, 07:40 PM
Robin will you never learn:( we can all see the meaning behind your joke or you would not have changed it:rolleyes: Just watch out for Wilf as once again you are showing why he had a go at you before :eek:

What change did I do? Don't recall editing that post. It was supposed to be an amusing comment as to how petty our squabbles are - it wasn't an advert for any particular vehicle. There are arguments for and against every kit and everyone has their own definition of "better" anyway.

Please believe me, I wasn't trying to laud the merits of my particular choice, and if you choose to interpret everything I write along those lines, then there isn't a lot I can do about that.

I'm not going to deny the fact that I bought a GD.

I'm also not going to deny the fact that I bought one because I considered it the best option available to suit my needs.

I'm not going to apologise for that.

Everyone is entitled to agree or disagree with my choice - after all, if everyone agreed that GD was "the best" then the other manufacturers would have gone out of business long ago - something that, fortunately, hasn't happened. Look at it from my point of view for a moment, I did the research into the various manufacturers and chose the one I liked the most. I'm hardly likely to deliberately choose the one I liked second best. I think some people are being a bit sensitive - after all, it was only supposed to be a joke

Robin427
05-03-06, 07:42 PM
(And yes it is an old gag. The varient i heard was Prince Charles asking if god could make world peace or the public like Camilla... :D )

The version I was paraphrasing involved building a bridge across the Atlantic or understanding women...
:)

Clarkson
05-03-06, 07:44 PM
HaHa,Thats right,if you don't like reading it then sod off! After all we are in the cockpit!!:D :D :D

plod
05-03-06, 07:46 PM
Yes. bo11 ox to em I say Robin though I would appreciate some credit for my on going allegiance to you, you GD loving idiot! XX

Robin427
05-03-06, 07:49 PM
Thanks, Paul, I don't know how I'd make it through the day without you. You are constant strength, guiding light and role model for me in this turbulent world.

Everyone, a toast to Paul, my hero :)

Andy302
05-03-06, 07:53 PM
Personally I think a few people round here need to lighten up a little. It wasnt the best joke Ive even seen, nor was it the worst. There are a few more important things in the world to worry about..... SO GET OVER IT! :mad:

Robin427
05-03-06, 07:55 PM
It wasnt the best joke Ive even seen

That's my comedy career finished then... :)

Clarkson
05-03-06, 07:57 PM
Everyone, a toast to Paul, my hero :)[/quote:85c2f36a7b]

You won't be saying that when he nicks you for speeding down the M23!:confused: :mad: :D :D

plod
05-03-06, 07:59 PM
Thanks, Paul, I don't know how I'd make it through the day without you. You are constant strength, guiding light and role model for me in this turbulent world.

Everyone, a toast to Paul, my hero :)

w4nker.......... :p

Mr Clarkson, wont be able to nick him because his GD is not capable of any such speeds... ha ha

Andy302
05-03-06, 07:59 PM
That's my comedy career finished then... :)

Yeah, Bill Bailey you aint! Still, it could be worse.......I let you know when I figure out how;) !

Robin427
05-03-06, 08:02 PM
w4nker.......... :p

Mr Clarkson, wont be able to nick him

Too busy catching proper criminals, I expect...

Clarkson
05-03-06, 08:04 PM
w4nker.......... :p

Mr Clarkson, wont be able to nick him because his GD is not capable of any such speeds... ha ha

HaHa:D :D :D especially when he crashs it getting it out of the garage!!:D :D

Robin427
05-03-06, 08:06 PM
HaHa:D :D :D especially when he crashs it getting it out of the garage!!:D :D

'ere, that's libel...

...it was backing INTO the garage... :mad:

Clarkson
05-03-06, 08:07 PM
'ere, that's libel...

...it was backing INTO the garage... :mad:

HaHa:D :D :D :D :D :D You make me laugh!!!!!

dave
05-03-06, 08:07 PM
The joke may have been in bad taste, but isn't that what jokes are all about.
No one had a hissy fit a few weeks ago when there was a joke about Gary Glitter and that tw4t is a f*kin' paedophile.


BTW. I first hear the same joke on a Jim Davidson tape (The type you buy from the filling station when the radio is cr4p).
That was about the middle east and the ugliness of Mrs Blair

Robin427
05-03-06, 08:16 PM
It's a solid joke structure - very versatile... like the:

What do you call 50,000 <insert something here> at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start...

Grease Monkey
05-03-06, 08:26 PM
OK, here's a better (or rather, longer) gag for you:


A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!" Ms. Brooks had had enough so she took Harry to the principal's office.

While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3 ?" Harry: "9" Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Harry: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade." Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions." The principal and Harry both agreed.

Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?" Harry, after a moment: "Legs." Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: "Pockets!"

Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?" Harry: "Pants". Ms. Brooks: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?" Harry: "Coconut."

The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?" The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer. Harry: "Bubble gum"

Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" Harry: "Shake hands." The principal was trembling.

Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'UCK' that means a lot of heat and excitement?" Harry: "Fire Truck".

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong.

COBRA KEV01
06-03-06, 12:22 PM
It's a solid joke structure - very versatile... like the:

What do you call 50,000 <insert something here> at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start...



Anyone hear this one.?
There was an Irishman,Englishman,Scottishman,Welshman.Puffter,I llegal Immigrant ,Pakistani,Muslim and Mike"T" and they were all having sunday lunch around Osgoods when there was a knock at the door and............................................... .................................................. .....

Miket
06-03-06, 01:02 PM
Anyone hear this one.?
There was an Irishman,Englishman,Scottishman,Welshman.Puffter,I llegal Immigrant ,Pakistani,Muslim and Mike"T" and they were all having sunday lunch around Osgoods when there was a knock at the door and Osgood said " quick, hide everybody, it's that dickhead COBRA KEV at the door"
Up yours. :mad: :mad: :mad:

COBRA KEV01
06-03-06, 04:16 PM
Up yours. :mad: :mad: :mad:








Evening Mike!!!!!!!!!!!
I do still love you ya know,i need also to return to you your c-spanner at some point,i will do so soon.

Neil O
06-03-06, 04:39 PM
Robin, your joke wasn't really very funny was it?



You, however, are. ;) ;)

Robin427
06-03-06, 08:37 PM
Wonderful complement accepted :)